Could the everyday habits that make you function better on the inside also make you more attractive on the outside?
After decades of working as a family doctor, I noticed something interesting:
The patients who consistently followed a handful of healthy habits didn’t just feel better. They often looked healthier, too.
The habits they adopted changed the way they showed up and moved through the world. You could see it in their posture, their words, and the confidence they emitted.
So whether you want to feel sharper, look more vibrant, or become someone people are naturally drawn to, here are six everyday habits to start adopting now.
1. Move your body (but not just for your body)
Most people start exercising to improve their body. And yes, movement is great for losing weight, building muscle, and improving cardiovascular health.
But its benefits go far beyond the physical.
Research consistently shows physical activity can lead to better memory, attention, executive function, mood, and cognitive health. And you can start noticing these effects after a single session.
Then over time, exercise also changes your presence. It shows up in your posture, gait, energy, and how you occupy space.
So if you’re looking to improve your self-esteem and confidence, exercise is the first place to start.
2. Protect your sleep like it affects your face, because it does
I’m sure you’ve noticed how after just one bad night’s sleep, your face looks a little duller or puffier. That’s because sleep has a bigger effect on your face than most beauty treatments.
There have been some fascinating experiments where researchers photographed people after adequate sleep and again after sleep restriction.
They then had independent observers rate the photographs. The sleep-deprived versions were perceived as more tired, less healthy, and less attractive.
So you see, “beauty sleep” isn’t something our grandmothers made up.
Sleep deprivation not only affects our cognitive functions, like memory and focus. It also shows up on the outside, through our skin, our eyes, our expression, and the energy we emit.
In other words, if you have a few nights of bad sleep, your entire social presence can get turned down a few notches.
3. Become a person who is interested in things
Research on curiosity suggests that when we’re genuinely interested in something, we learn and remember information better.
This is because interest sparks curiosity, curiosity directs attention, and attention helps learning.
Thus, over a period of years, curious people accumulate an enormous mental library. But aside from knowing things, their curiosity makes them become INTERESTED people.
They ask good questions, they’re fascinated by the world, and they’re interested in what others have experienced.
So if you want to increase your social power and become someone that people don’t forget, curiosity is one of the most attractive habits you can develop.
4. Have real conversations
Being curious is one thing. But actually knowing how to have a good conversation with another human being is another.
And in this modern world of online communication, this is a skill we’re slowly losing.
Face-to-face conversation engages our brains more than texting or email. You have to listen carefully to follow the story, while also reading facial expressions, picking up on humor, and noticing shifts in tone.
It’s a surprisingly complex cognitive task. And it’s why social engagement is repeatedly associated with improved cognitive health as we age.
But it also develops something else: social attractiveness.
You learn how to listen, how to ask follow-up questions, how to make someone else feel interesting, and how to read a room.
So if you want to appear more attractive, seek out real conversations. Talk with a wide range of people, including those who are completely different from you.
The more you have conversations where you can’t edit yourself before you hit send, the more your brain and your social skills will grow.
5. Eat for energy, not a smaller body
I spent twenty years talking to people about food as a practicing family doctor. And most of these nutrition conversations were focused on weight loss.
It made me realize that so many people reduce food to something that affects our weight. But it’s so much more than that.
Food also affects every aspect of how you function.
It affects your energy, your concentration, your mood, your ability to exercise, and your productivity.
Eat the right food, and you can power through your day feeling amazing. Eat the wrong food, and you can hit a wall of fatigue by 2 pm and fight the urge to nap for the rest of the day.
And of course, our diet reflects our vitality.
If we eat well, we appear alert, strong, energetic, and mobile, which are all qualities people perceive as attractive.
It might sound boring, but getting enough protein, eating lots of plants and fiber, and drinking enough water can be the difference between looking dull and looking vibrant.
6. Regularly do something you are not good at yet
Learning something new requires an enormous amount of effort from your brain as you build a brand new mental model.
You have to pay attention, make mistakes, then learn from those mistakes to correct and avoid repeating them.
Making mistakes may leave us feeling a bit ridiculous, but it’s what keeps us young.
Being a beginner is incredibly humbling. You might make some progress only to then immediately take 2 steps back.
Yet this dance of improving, experimenting, and learning from people who are better than you expands your horizons and creates new versions of yourself you didn’t know existed.
If you only ever did things that reinforced your old identity, your world would gradually get smaller, and you’d become less interesting.
But if you keep putting yourself in the beginner’s seat, you’ll continually become more interesting, and thus, more attractive.
The pattern underneath all six
All 6 of these habits cultivate a sense of aliveness. They change how you feel on the inside, which then changes how you appear to others.
In my latest YouTube video, I share how I’ve adopted these 6 everyday habits in my own life, and how they have amplified my confidence, energy, and vitality.
Watch here:
So, which of these 6 habits are you going to start with this week? Let me know in the comments below!
Resources:
- Try Shortform For Free: Get A Free-Trial (And A Discount On Your Annual Subscription)
- Order my NEW BOOK “Redesigning You”: https://drkimfoster.com/book
- Dr. Kim on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/drkimfoster/
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